at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
The Olympian is in my bed
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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