Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
