As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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