I think i peed on brittanys purse
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
