"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize