Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
