Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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