I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
She has the best kind of daddy issues
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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