none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
