next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
