you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
