I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
