Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
