why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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