no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
