plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
