What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
