How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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