You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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