Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
