I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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