What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
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