so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I just gift wrapped bread.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
