i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
