The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Your dad touched me again.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
