I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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