hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
