yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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