It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize