But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
