Your tits are I can't wait for
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
