Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
