that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize