i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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