There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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