you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
