Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Is her dick bigger than yours?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
