She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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