If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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