I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
