An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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