My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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