you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize