Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
