I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
