it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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