I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
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