you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize