But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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