Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Randomize
